Coming Out Of The Dark

Although individual motives for suicide vary, there are some common warning signs. These signs may indicate that someone is at risk or is having personal, family or school problems.

Suicides seldom occur without warning. If you are aware of common signs and of changes in behaviour, you can recognize and better help a person in crisis. These signs represent behaviors that can serve as a warning sign. The warning signs are usually physical, emotional and behavioral in nature:

Physical Signs

• Neglect of personal appearance.
• Sudden changes in manner of dress, especially when the new style is completely out of character.
• Chronic or unexplained illness, aches and pains.
• Sudden weight gain or loss.
• Sudden change in appetite.

Emotional Clues

• Sense of hopelessness, helplessness or futility.
• Inability to enjoy or appreciate friendships.
• Wide mood changes and sudden outbursts.
• Anxiousness, extreme tension and agitation.
• Lethargy or tiredness.
• Changes in personality: from outgoing to withdrawn, from polite to rude, from compliant to rebellious, from well-behaved to “acting out.”
• Loss of the ability to concentrate; daydreaming.
• Depression, sadness.
• Loss of rational thought.
• Feelings of guilt and failure.
• Self-destructive thoughts.
• Exaggerated fears of cancer, AIDS or physical impairment.
• Feelings of worthlessness or of being a burden.
• Loss of enjoyment from activities formerly enjoyed.

Behavioral Signs

• Decreased school activity; isolation. Sudden drop in achievement and interest in school subjects.
• Loss of interest in hobbies, sports, work etc.
• Unexplained use of alcohol or other drugs.
• Increased use of alcohol or other drugs.
• Withdrawal from family and former friends, sometimes acting in a manner which forces others away.
• Changes in eating and/or sleeping habits.
• Changes in friendship.
• Running away from home; “skipping school.”
• Accident proneness and increase in risk-taking behavior such as careless driving, bike accidents, dangerous use of firearms.
• Sexual promiscuity.
• Giving away prized possessions
• Preoccupation with thoughts of death.
• Sudden changes in personality.
• Making a will; writing poetry or stories about suicide or death.
• Quietly putting affairs in order, “taking care of business.”
• Threatening suicide.
• Hoarding pills, hiding weapons, describing methods for committing suicide.
• Previous suicide attempts.

While all of these signs may indicate that a person is experiencing problems, the last five behavioral signs are especially significant. (These signs indicate that a decision to complete suicide may have been made.) A previous attempt is a particularly important sign. Such an attempt increases the risk of future ones. In any of the signs, the key word is CHANGE.

The symptoms of depression, including the list of “acting out” behaviors and the common warning signs for suicide are very similar. Together, they provide ways to recognize a person at risk.

RED FLAG WARNING SIGNS-
* A previously depressed person who is suddenly happy. This often means they’ve come to a decision to end their life.
* Actions that signal they are planning for death:
* Giving away their possessions, particularly favorite things or things with sentimental value.
* Making out wills.
* Arranging for the care of pets.
* Extravagant spending or paying off debts.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU THINK A PERSON IS HAVING SUICIDAL THOUGHTS

* Ask the person directly if he or she (1) is having suicidal thoughts/ideas, (2) has a plan to do so, and (3) has access to lethal means:  This won’t increase the person’s suicidal thoughts. It will give you information that indicates how strongly the person has thought about killing him- or herself.

* Take seriously all suicide threats and all suicide attempts. A past history of suicide attempts is one of the strongest risk factors for death by suicide.

* There is no evidence that “nosuicide contracts” prevent suicide. In fact, they may give counselors a false sense of reassurance.

Common Misconceptions about Suicide

FALSE: People who talk about suicide won’t really do it.
Almost everyone who commits or attempts suicide has given some clue or warning. Do not ignore suicide threats. Statements like “you’ll be sorry when I’m dead,” “I can’t see any way out,” — no matter how casually or jokingly said may indicate serious suicidal feelings.

FALSE: Anyone who tries to kill him/herself must be crazy.
Most suicidal people are not psychotic or insane. They must be upset, grief-stricken, depressed or despairing, but extreme distress and emotional pain are not necessarily signs of mental illness.

FALSE: If a person is determined to kill him/herself, nothing is going to stop him/her.
Even the most severely depressed person has mixed feelings about death, wavering until the very last moment between wanting to live and wanting to die. Most suicidal people do not want death; they want the pain to stop. The impulse to end it all, however overpowering, does not last forever.

FALSE: People who commit suicide are people who were unwilling to seek help .
Studies of suicide victims have shown that more then half had sought medical help within six month before their deaths.

FALSE: Talking about suicide may give someone the idea.
You don’t give a suicidal person morbid ideas by talking about suicide. The opposite is true –bringing up the subject of suicide and discussing it openly is one of the most helpful things you can do.  Source:  SAVE – Suicide Awareness Voices of Education

* Listen and look for red flags for suicidal behavior, indicated by the mnemonic:

IS PATH WARM?
Ideation—Threatened or communicated
Substance abuse—Excessive or increased

Purposeless—No reasons for living
Anxiety—Agitation/Insomnia
Trapped—Feeling there is no way out
Hopelessness

Withdrawing—From friends, family, society
Anger (uncontrolled)—Rage, seeking revenge
Recklessness—Risky acts, unthinking
Mood changes (dramatic)

HOW TO BE HELPFUL FOR SOMEONE WHO IS TALKING ABOUT OR THREATENING SUICIDE

* If you think a person might harm him or herself, don’t leave them alone.
* Be direct. Talk openly and matter-of-factly about suicide.
* Be willing to listen. Allow expressions of feelings. Accept the feelings.
* Be non-judgmental. Don’t debate whether suicide is right or wrong, or whether feelings are good or bad. Don’t lecture on the value of life.
* Get involved. Become available. Show interest and support.
* Don’t dare him or her to do it.
* Don’t act shocked. This will put distance between you.
* Don’t be sworn to secrecy. Seek support.
* Offer hope that alternatives are available but do not offer glib reassurance.
* Take action. Remove means, such as guns or stockpiled pills.
* Get help from persons or agencies specializing in crisis intervention and suicide prevention.
* Tell them you’re going to get them some help. Give him or her a helpful resource – Send 1-800-273-TALK (8255) Tell him/her they are available 24/7 for anyone in suicidal crisis in the United States
* Take his/her words seriously and respond with compassion
* Encourage him/her to reach out for help to a friend, family member, counselor, clergy and other community members
* If the person online is saying he/she is going to kill him or herself at that moment or is in the process of attempting suicide, please try to find his/her location and call the local police or 911.

If you like this articles, share it with your friend! Digg it StumbleUpon Facebook Twitter del.icio.us Google Yahoo! Reddit